Go Taiwan '09.
More pretty clothes.
Car License!!! By end 2009 early 2010
My hair to grow FASTER and LONG.
Travel around the world.
Be with my beloved friends and family.
True Luv someday.
Christian Dior addict 2.
my own B bag
ASA
MinHui——niece
Singyee
Adeline 'cousin'
ms^TieTou
sTanLey
Fortune Cat
STYLE ATTITUDE!!!
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Thursday, January 18, 2007
haiz...recently getting moody out of no reason...thinking about lotz of things....jobs searching, financial issues gosh...recently having sleeping disorders...
argh...i wonder when can i get rid of my feelings for him...i want to keep a distance from him yet his my good friend i really having hard time to give up on him....i know he's not a nice guy because he's not caring, sensitive, appreciative, thoughtful and most importantly he's not very good looking....i heard lotz of comments, advices and encouragements from friends it's just that i think i needed to take the first step myself...without me doing it myself i guess i will never walk away fro him and look for another new guy myself...do i really have to wait till i know a new guy then i will be able to give him up...maybe like PW says i like him is a habit not a feeling now.....
monday going to re register for my driving test this time daddy is going to pay for me haha...thanks daddy for always giving me lots of financial support and encouragements...although you might be a bit lor so but i know you doing this for my own good...really thank you for not being "zhong nan qing nu" towards me and kor kor i know you had your difficulties in helping me due to mummy's stopping yet you still help...i know i wasted a lot of your money i really hope you don't blame me and i will work hard to pay you back the money...
sometimes i whether i hate my mum or i don't to me is 50 -50 ...50 is when she don't understands and trust me and she don't give me the freedom to do whatever i want to do like going home late or stay at friends house but i can't my mum always listens to my brother without listening to my explanations she keeps dwell on my sad matters keep discouraging me ...although i keep comparing myself like them yet it's useless...
some people get to go home late but they are working to earn the allowance themselves that's why their parents don't control them....
some although they had their freedom yet they don't have the love from their parents that they always wanted all along...
some had a wonderful family they had their freedom they can don't even work to get their allowance as they will get their allowance eventually yet nobody knows what lies inside this family they may look carefree and living together harmoniously but are they?
some they get to learn piano which people like me don't have the opportunity to learn at all...but they had a strict rule in the family although their parents might be strict to them....they are still living together loving each other...sometimes they do get a little freedom....
the other half of my mum which i don't hate her yet i do love her whenever i feel sad or i quarrel with my best friend my mum will be there to help me solve my matters...whenever i did well for my studies she will always be the 1st person to reward me no matter how expensive my request is she willing buy it for my sake although some are not very expensive although it might cost around $50 but that's very rarely she buys for me with that amount ...i really do appreciate what she do for me yet sometimes the way she do is in a wrong way...whenever i confides with her although not much the advices she gave was useful...i really appreciated her being strict with me throughout my secondary school years if not i might become ah lian in the streets or like one of my classmate married at the age of 19 and 7 months pregnant....what i hope now is really ope she can treat me as an adult not a teenager i turning 20 this year already i don't want be treat like a teenager...i know what i doing whether its' wrong or right i know how to differentiate....
now i have been trying to go for my sessions and keep on to my diet so far now i reach 80kg...quite a big achievement now...as compared to my usual weight is around 84 my heaviest was 88 scary huh...now i gotta work harder and tomorrow go attend my session hopefully can slim till 70kg by 1 month's time....must pray hard...and hopefully i can get a job by this month mummy is nagging at me now...i really had enough of her nagging really want to stop it already....argh....
9:11 PM